Friday, September 19, 2014

2005-2009: Alligator Pie.

So much to love. In 2009 the Dave Matthews Band released Big Whiskey and the Groo Grux King. I don't know that I had anticipated a release of theirs as much as this one. And I don't know that I have loved a collective of their work as much since the release of Before These Crowded Streets. This album is stunning.

It was also in 2009 that I found myself dancing under the stars at Bethel Woods for the first time. It may have been one of the brightest of spots after dark days immediately following B's birth.

No joke, though...riding around in my car, jamming to this album, in particular this song, after those difficult months was a healing and soothing burst of light. The beauty of music, right?

I've opted to post a live track of this as there is no official video and live is what they do best. And also, Dave explains the refrain and how, really, he's just a daddy writing songs to please his little girl. Le sigh and all the loves.

Rock out. Enjoy your Friday. The last five years, reflecting the last five years, starts next week and this little retrospective is full of oodles of emotion.

Thursday, September 18, 2014

2005-2009: She Is.

This half decade can also be called the decade of Scrubs. And my enormous Zach Braff crush. And all the musical influences. Ha! And so, I stumbled across The Fray. And then I stumbled across this song. And then I thought of my daughter.

Not to make it seem like I don't think these thoughts about B, but my journey of learning, accepting, and then truly comprehending the impact that L have Ds would have on my life is a unique and intense experience. These lyrics just bring it all home for me. How much I needed her to change me.

"...She is everything I need that I never knew I wanted
She is everything I want that I never knew I needed..."

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

2005-2009: Who Says You Can't Go Home?

From my earliest memories, the voices of those around me were telling me to vacate my hometown. Of little industry or economic stimulation it always seemed that I would fare better elsewhere. For a time in the late 90s there were bumper stickers on many residents' cars asking the last one out of town to "turn off the lights". And so, I left. In 1994 I left for college. In 1998, I left for taking me throughout the lower Hudson Valley to NYC to New Hampshire to Connecticut and back again. All of it marked with restlessness.

As grad school came to its conclusion and family plans began to take shape, M and I started the migration "back home". Not quite all the way to my hometown but closer than I had been in a long, long time. At the time it felt like a welcome relief...that maybe the restlessness would subside if I found my place again. We all know that it didn't turn out quite like that, but at the time, this song sounded like a call to action.

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

2005-2009: Ribbons Undone.

I've written about this song before. I have loved Tori Amos since college and The Beekeeper is, start to finish, one of the best albums I own. Written for and about her daughter, this song was on repeat for the entire duration of my pregnancy with L. I was so excited to be having a little girl.

I couldn't listen to this for a long, long, long time after L's birth and diagnosis because I didn't think I was getting that charming little girl child who would run across a field picking flowers.

Turns out...I did. And more. And I still can't hear this without sobbing, but now it's with a heart bursting for love of my daughter. My beautiful, perfect, amazement of a daughter.

Monday, September 15, 2014

2005-2009: Winding Road.

If there is an album that sounds like grad school it is the Garden State soundtrack. It was tough to pull a favorite to share, but I went with Bonnie Somerville's "Winding Road". Better known for playing Ross' girlfriend, Mona, on Friends, she had dated Zach Braff and wrote this song for the film. This soundtrack is exceptional and this song was always a little extra meaningful, as midway through grad school M and I moved the closest I had lived to my hometown for more than a decade.

Friday, September 12, 2014

2000-2004: Hey Ya!

Friday fun, y'all. And perhaps one of the top three songs of the new millennium.

I've been forgetting the addition of Friday's book selection for each half decade. I had last left off in 1990-1994 with The Great Gatsby. 

1995-1999: The Handmaid's Tale, by Margaret Atwood. I say it everysingletime EVERY woman, or man who knows, values, or loves a woman, or any human who wants to be made more aware, needs to read this book. 

2000-2004: The Color Purple. Masterpiece. 

Thursday, September 11, 2014

2000-2004: Only God Knows Why.

We are experiencing some date-based deviations from the plan here at Running Toward Om. The scheduled post was Coldplay's "The Scientist". But, on this day, it is impossible to pass through these hours without remembering. 

The unbearably blue sky. The shattering of my own personal innocence. The shift in the universe, in our consciousness. 

Released in 1999, Kid Rock's "Only God Knows Why" is chronologically not supposed to be on this place in this list. But, for some inexplicable reason, this song is 9/11 in my memory. 

And so, today, we deviate. And we remember. And tomorrow, as with September 12, 2001, we pick up and we move forward. 

"So I think I'll keep a walking
With my head held high.
I'll keep moving on 
And only God knows why."