Thursday, December 18, 2014

Work Life Balance.

This is a thing, right? That millions of Americans bemoan on the regular because their 9-5 grind is bringing them down?

I apologize. I can't say that I relate. It's been 18 months and I still can't always comprehend how lucky I am. I love what I do. I love where I do it. I love the people I do it for. I love the people who I call my coworkers. I love that we do Secret Santa like it's a high stakes thing. I love that I have stumbled upon a colleague who doubles as a blessing of a friend.

I love that our holiday festivities look like this...

Secret Santa gift #1. The second was a bell that says "Ring for Wine". I'd post the pic but Instagram is holding it hostage. 

Polka-dotted wine glasses! Whoot!

Ummm. What??? 

Her. This is why my department is called the family. 

When your work is like mine, it makes that "balance" thing far less of an issue, for sure. 


Fifi is a boy mouse. He has a blue body and pink ears. One day Fifi went out to play but did not want to come back inside. He wanted to stay playing with his friends. 

His mom told him to come inside but he did not listen. His friend Lucy told him to come inside and sleep with her and he did. 


Second Grade. 2014. 

Wednesday, December 17, 2014


This week, Christmas arrived at the Penthouse. This week marks one year since I packed up my little corner of the universe and stepped into this new life. 

Yes. For the rest of my life I will be the mom who moved out 10 days before Christmas. Judge if you need're not thinking anything I haven't already told myself. And I am certain my self-talk is far more brutal. 

A little tree. A stash of wrapped gifts hidden in the closet until Santa officially delivers them. These are the things that quantify this journey. 

I likely won't know for some time if I handled this the "right" way, as well as I could have. I know that each moment of the past year has been conducted to the very best of my ability. And I have no regrets; for whatever has been less than perfect has also been a lesson. 

Tomorrow I get my littles back after a long stretch with their Daddy. I'm excited for them to sit with me, in front of our little tree, and feel warmth and love and joy. 

Sunday, November 30, 2014

thankful happenings.

To properly celebrate the Thanksful season, and to NOT drive in blizzardy conditions, I took a five day weekend starting Wednesday. I had the littles and they forced me out of doors into the madness. 

She makes it a tiny bit worth it...

...but this is still a more accurate portrayal of how I feel about snow. 

This, though. This is how I woke up Thanksgiving morning. It gets no better. 

The kids were with M and other assorted family for the actual Thanksgiving festivities, and I hosted a couple of friends for dinner. But first. A snowy run. 

And then a thanksful celebration of cheese...

...and a faux-Jenga tournament called Drunken Towers. That is all the commentary I will make. 

Not that I let the shenanigans stop me from killing it on Friday morning. 

Speaking of killing beloved Chucks are in some serious disrepair. I'll be stalking online deals from now until the yuletide for replacements. 

Overall, it was a lovely weekend. I ran so many miles, and spent time with people I adore, and started to feel a little jolly in my heart. 

And it all culminated in this morning's yoga class. A strong shaft of sunlight cutting across the studio floor. Gladness. And thankful. 


Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Thankful 2014.

This year has been unlike any other I've ever experienced. Transitional, exhausting, uplifting, introspective, exuberant, ass-kicking while still kicking ass. 

And when I look back in wonder and in gratitude, most of the deepest, blessings-laden moments this year were tiny. Quiet. 

Me and the nearest and dearest. Me, myself. 

Waking up with them...

...stumbling upon some good fortune...

...uncovering strength and fortitude...

...gazing at his determination with pride and wonder...

...beautiful May afternoons with her...

...and morning coffee with her..

...and, of course, just this radiant slice of sass...

...loving them loving on each other...

...relishing in the joy of the extended family...

...and, ah...The Penthouse...

...simply discovering... beginnings...

...and a concert nearly 20 years in the making...

...sharing in personal triumphs with a friend...

...and, as ever, a heart full beyond comprehension.

And always. The running. And the sunshine...

From the road.

To start the day.

To end the day.

After the storm.

In Indianapolis.

Looking up at them as they are looking down on me.

"There are years that ask questions and years that answer." ~Zora Neale Hurston, Their Eyes Were Watching God. 

Sunday, November 23, 2014

all the loves.

Highlights since last post:

B lost that wiggly tooth. Just due to coincidences in scheduling, it was the first time the Tooth Fairy got to visit the Penthouse. She informed me that it was a nerve-wracking expedition as charming old houses have squeaky doors and creaky floors. But watching him run out of his bedroom with his silly grin and a fiver made it all worth it. 

And then! He had a birthday party. With school friends. It was a new experience and he was beaming the entire day. 

These two. I can't even properly caption this except to say "Gaaaaahhhhh! Love." 

And of course. That smile. Forever and ever that smile. It lights my path in the darkest of darks. 

A holiday ritual from my childhood passed on: circling items in the Christmas catalog so that Santa knows what to bring. It also brought about an opportunity for L to school her Mama:

L: I'm going to tell Santa that I like Doc McStuffins, and Frozen, and that I want a two kit.
Me: That's great! What's a two kit? 
L: No, Mom. T-O-O-L. Tool kit. {and then she audibly sighed at my inability to function at her level.}

Speaking of Santa! Our first interaction of the season at the DSA holiday party! 

And, of course: more generosity. If you look back at the catalog picture you'll see I was gifted an area rug by one of my favorite peeps. And then, my girl Jill brought me a bed and a kitchen set to replace the ones I had been using. The old bed had a captain's style headboard and I kept these words on there, but I had to move them. Now they grace the doorway to my happy place and serve as a reminder. Today B asked me what they meant...

...Live. Each day because it's a blessing and deserves all you've got to give it. 
...Laugh. It's, seriously, the very best thing. 
...Love. At the end of the day, that's what we're here for. It is the force that creates. It is what keeps the earth spinning.