Sunday, November 16, 2014

still running.

It occurred to me that I have not posted a thing about running in nearly five weeks. Considering how vital posting my running stats here was to my early development as a runner, this lapse seems nearly incomprehensible to me. But alas, it's true.

Though, if we're being reals, my posting in general seems to have taken a downturn. Such is the life of a blogger, I guess.

But, have no fear. I am still running. "Like a fiend" is a popular refrain amongst my nearest and dearest, though it was far less fiendish in October. A difficult combination of scheduling, post-race recovery, and other distractions, I ran a scant 45.4 miles in October. And 13.1 of that was on one day! To put it in perspective, I had not run that few miles in a month since August 2013 {41.1}. The closest monthly total I had this year was 45.5 on the days-short February. To say I was frustrated is an understatement.

I am happy to report that as of mid-month I am already at 40.5 miles for November. Honestly, any month below 60 miles feels like a loss to me.

Given the recent time change and rapidly approaching winter season, I made a small purchase this week.

Now I'll still be able to get out during the week after work. The treadmill has become absolutely unacceptable to me, and I vow to use it only on the worst of the worst days. Otherwise, I'll be out there with my blinking LED flashers, running after dark, simply because I can.

This was a 16.56 mile weekend, with evening runs Friday and tonight. And of course, Saturday saw the euphoric joy of 10 chilly miles on my rail trail with all the sunshine a girl could ask for.


Running toward om? Running till Spring.

PS: Just so everyone is aware, GO HARD 2014 {globally organized hug a runner day} is this week! November 20th. Hug a runner!

Monday, November 10, 2014

turning a corner

There was a moment, just before bedtime. He was reading me his new Star Wars: A New Hope early reader book, and wiggling his newly loose tooth with his tongue as he turned pages. Much like yesterday's read, he couldn't finish a page without expounding on each character or turn of events in great detail. He is all seriousness wrapped up in the soft skin of his babyhood, and I realize we're turning a corner. 

He's six. That's like, person aged. 

I intuited his personality before he was born. He is simply everything. My love. The boy who most fiercely has snagged my heart.

Happy 6th Birthday, B. Don't grow up too quickly.

the most perfect day.

At 7am, a warm snuggly girl child nestled her way into my bed. At yoga, teacher demonstrated a shoulder stand sequence that made me gasp in awe, and then laugh at the ludicrous thought that I could accomplish it. Which I then totally did. Thirty minutes on the elliptical, during which time I discovered Magic's "Rude" is the most perfect combination of cadences for that specific device.

Brunch at the penthouse because my kids have followed me into the love of bacon and French toast. Overcome with a feeling of domesticity that resulted in a stockpot of simmering baked potato soup that'll last me ages.

Grocery shopping on a 55 degree day....

Hold up. That ain't right. PLAYGROUND on a 55 degree day.

This smile never dims. 

He's going to be six tomorrow. I'm still baffled by this. 

This was the highlight of playground time. As this picture was being taken, she said, "Mommy. I'm so scared." She made several attempts to climb up to the top, and B came over to help coach her along. When she made it up he hugged her and told her he was proud. Then he climbed down to coach her back down. And hugged her and told her he was so proud. This happened four more times. 

So chill. 

Oh. And then this happened, because there is no rule at all about Mamas being on the playground zip line and B loves a chance to snap some photos. 

We've had a blessedly gorgeous and prolonged and vibrant and colorful Autumn in the Hudson Valley and on days such as this, I can't help wonder if it'll be the last and so we head outside. They played so hard, L fell asleep in the car.

AND THEN. We grocery shop. Upon return L spontaneously put on the Annie dvd, and I am convinced I have won at motherhood. Finishing working my way through some groceries bestowed upon me by one of my favorite folks, and so {logically} chicken fajitas from scratch. Which L, loved. Of course all this time in the kitchen means every dish I own has been used, washed, and reused multiple times today. But it smells good here, the kitchen is toasty, and all the bellies are full.

All the perfection culminating in my sweetest boy showing me his first loose tooth on the eve of his 6th birthday.

== // ==


I take that back. The perfection culminated in B taking 20 minutes to read me his Star Wars: The Clone Wars book, complete with an encyclopedic overview of the entire Star Wars universe. And L falling asleep like this...

My soul sighs the happiest of sighs.  

Sunday, November 2, 2014

godspeed and fare thee well.

The love I have for this little rectangle is not natural. I understand that it borders on the absurd, and the slightly shallow, but I make no apologies.

A few weeks ago, the power button just stopped powering. I hadn't realized what a compulsive screen locker I was until that happened. But, I set up the assistive touch and all was salvageable.

Shortly after that, I found myself running across the concrete concessions area of the stadium at which we held the Buddy Walk. My phone was in my jacket pocket until suddenly it wasn't and concrete is really unforgiving. Remarkably, the actual crack in the phone was minimal considering no case. That didn't translate in usability, though, and slowly over the past few days the touch screen has become increasingly persnickity. *sigh*

Finally, today, I caved and made the upgrade. I really just wanted to get another 4s because I think it was last best phone Apple made. I really did not want to get the 6 because I hate it. So, I split the difference and picked up a 5s. And a case. Because if nothing else, I'm pretty adept at learning my lesson.

I may keep my broken 4s forever and ever just because. And because Sprint won't give me anything for it through their buyback program. But mostly because sentimental.

Friday, October 31, 2014

six years. and one day.

Yesterday marked six years of me doing what I do here in this space. Musing. Muttering. Over disclosing. Ranting. Connecting. Sharing. Processing. 

Probably due to not participating in 31 for 21 this year, I nearly missed it. But here I am. I don't have a ton to say on the subject. I've been introspective-y enough for most of October so I can't really traipse down bloggity memory lane. Ha! 

So instead...

I think it's rather appropriate to end this uber-reflective month with Dia de los Muertos. Day of the Dead. Celebrating all that was. Looking forward to all that will be. 

Thanks, always, for reading. And Happy Halloween! 

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

spelling test.

"After shower you need to study for your spelling test."

When did it become my life to speak these words? How have I come to have a child old enough for this to be true? And yet. That was my evening.

And PS -- who knew that two missing front teeth could be the cutest thing on the planet. 

Hopefully this video makes up for the complete lack of #31for21 this year. 

Monday, October 20, 2014


A couple of posts ago I taunted with mention of a post dedicated to the manner in which the universe has provided for me this past year. As with all of my musings about my new living situation, I am always hesitant because I know my being in this new space hurts people that I care about. But there come times when I am so overwhelmed by it all that I must write it out lest I burst. This is one of those occasions -- most notably because it hasn't been one occasion as much as it has been a multitude of such occasions. The universe has been generous, indeed.

From the moment I set out to find a place to situate myself, I noticed this compassionate care. I never look at Craigslist for apartments. People die on Craigslist. But, I felt compelled to do so. And I never look at ads on Craigslist that don't have pictures because why bother, yet based on the address, I felt compelled to look at the listing for this apartment. And it has turned out better than I could have anticipated.

In the ten months that I have lived here, I've had to largely recreate something of a home. This is where the verklempt comes in, because whoa. From small to significant, to absolutely necessary to subtle and thoughtful, I've had more bestowed upon me than one girl should ever have. One friend gave me a bed. My colleagues have collectively given me two couches, an entertainment center, furniture for the kids' bedroom, a brand new coffee pot, and just today (hence forcing me to finally sit and put this all down) a bag full of books and coffee mugs (because when your office is directly next to mine you come to know what I like.)

One friend had lost his grandfather a few months ago, and he and his parents allowed me to ransack their estate sale -- providing a full set of pots, pans, baking dishes, and a wide assortment of other kitchen goodies. Another friend, in a not dissimilar situation to my own and not having a ton of "extra" to share, gave me a cutting board and cheese grater because those things are wicked important.

An air conditioner. End tables. Clothes. Bottles of wine "conveniently" left behind. Bags of groceries that just happened to be lying around. Mason jars. Candle sticks. Vases.

When I again decided to trust Craigslist, I found the bunkbeds on which my children sleep. This stranger, forever in my phone contacts as BunkBed Mike, not only cut me a deal on them, but then delivered them to my house, 20 minutes away, on Easter weekend -- because his kids had used them when he first moved into his own place eight years ago. Kindred.

And then. I type all of this from a macbook, handed to me in kindness and generosity because my laptop fried back in February and a new computer is not in the 2015 Austerity Budget.

Let it not be overlooked that these are just the things. These words do not represent the hours of love and friendship. Conversations, pep talks, hugs, tears dried, and laughter induced as I have navigated through the worst of everything last October to these days of hope and contented sighs.

I know I am forgetting stuff; and it's not out of a lack of appreciation as much as it is out of complete overwhelmedness. {new word; you're welcome}. Literally, there is not a day that I do not take a moment to recognize and express thanks for how very blessed my life is. I've learned so much about how little I need to be happy, and how much people will share of themselves when they meet you in love and friendship.

I frequently use a hashtag on Instagram #soblessed. And it is the one true thing.

Sunday, October 19, 2014


Buddy Walk. 2014.

I missed most of it. I won't lie. Turns out, being presidential is a lot of work, if you can believe that. I have exactly two pictures on my phone from the day, and they are both shots I took before the event to post on my DSA's Facebook page. If not for the grace of my friends and Team L team members, I'd have nary a memory to share with y'all.

But, alas, our team came through and here are some of the moments they experienced...while I ran around a baseball stadium with a map, a microphone, and a mission.

B and S lead off the charge! 

Soccer on a baseball field? Sho' nuff. 

L and Aunt K

Doing the Daddy Thing. 

B getting a pointer from Coach. 

My littles and the littles of my best girl. Swooning. 

The Annual Fearless Foursome Fence Photo. {Foto?} New Venue, New Fence. 

But this shot made my day. THIS is what it's all about. 

There was one moment, when I stood atop the first base dugout and watched hundreds of friends and family and community members walk the outer perimeter of the field and it was astounding. The crowd nearly extended the entire circumference of the stadium. My heart was so very, very full.

Happy Buddy Walk Day, Hudson Valley.